Tuesday, June 29, 2021

Road Trip Day Seven: High Plains Driftwood

 Day Seven was supposed to be a power drive from Rapid City, South Dakota to Madison, Wisconsin.  I intended to do the 772 miles in about 12 hours.  The day started out walking sideways, but I thought I had turned that around. 

Over the last few days I had been developing an increasing painful and restrictive stiff neck.  When I arrived at Rapid City I stopped at a Walgreens and picked up an ice pack and Salonpas.  I figured I would ice and then hot shower, rinse and repeat for a few hours; get some sleep and be on the road.  But I just couldn’t get comfortable enough to sleep.  At midnight I gave up.  The car was loaded and I was on the road at 1230AM. 


At 1230AM, there is absolutely no one on Highway 90 in South Dakota. The speed limit is 80MPH, so I set the self-drive control to 84MPH.  Dial in my podcast and flew through the slightly foggy night.  By the way, that’s my thing – Podcasts.   If you drive a lot, Wondery is a great app.  I like the Podcast Cold.  The current one I am listening to multi-decade look at a Utah Cold Case.  They are phenomenally well produced. 

Part of my genius overnight power drive was to stop every 45 minutes, get out of the car and stretch.  I set the timer on my phone and when 45 minutes passed I stopped at the next off ramp.  At 0430AM, as I am screaming down the highway, the sun begins to come up.  I can see that is nothing but flat farmland. About 6AM commuter traffic had picked up as I came to a major construction zone.  The speed limit reduces to 45MPH so that you can crossover the meridian and enter a 10 mile stretch of two-way on the same side.  The other side is completely closed off.

After crossing over, the speed limit increase to 60MPH.  The only thing separating you for oncoming


traffic is a bunch of cones.  I had switched off the auto drive and accelerating out of the 45MPH transition into to 60MPH.  As I reach about 58MPH, there is a loud bang and the rear of the car begins to make a loud crashing noise and drift every so slightly left.  Also, multiple alarms sounded and flashed on the dash.  I immediately thought tire blow out and then followed that up with: can’t be – the tires are new, like brand new.  I defaulted back to blow out, took my foot off the accelerator and as the car slowed I steered to the right.  Except there is NO SHOULDER!  Just a ditch.  I can see cars coming on in the rear-view mirror so I hit the emergency flashers and steer the slowing car off the road and down the ditch embankment.  I come to stop at the flattest point. 

Cars and trucks wiz by about 6 feet from me.  I get out and inspect the tire.  Yep, toast.  Next, I pop the trunk, move the luggage and inspect the donut.  All good.  I consider changing the tire.  Except, the ditch is all tall grass on a semi-damp base.  I can see that the little scissor jack is only going to sink in and not lift the car.   That’s okay, I am a 35-year member of the AutoClub with Premier Membership. 

When I call the Autoclub all I can tell them is I am several miles east of the 81 on Highway 90.  I use my phone to get my exact latitude and longitude and the AutoClub operator is able to pinpoint my location – supposedly.  The operator tells me the truck has a one-hour ETA.  I then look up the nearest KIA Dealership is Sioux Falls, South Dakota – their service department opens at 730AM.  So I figure that at 730, before the tow arrives I can call the service department and see about getting a replacement tire. 

I am a little concerned because my car has high performance tires.  While waiting for the service department at KIA in Sioux Falls to open, the tow driver calls me.  He can’t find me.  I tell him on the 90 east of the 81.  Well, he was told west of the 81.  He has 45 minute ETA, maybe.  At 735AM I call the Kia service department is Sioux Falls.  It takes three calls to get through (they kept sending me to a voice mail), eventually I get the parts manager and ask him if he has the tire.  He checks and says he doesn’t but he can order them from Wisconsin.  He finishes by saying “We should have the tire in four or five days.”  In my defense, I had the stiff neck, no sleep and the blowout when I replied, “Five days!  Do you ship them by fucking donkey?”

There was silence.  I broke the silence.  “Okay, I can’t wait five days.  What are my other options?”

He replies, “You could call around to the tire dealers in Sioux City and see if one of them has one.”

I state very calmly, “So, your best advice to the owner of a brand new KIA K5 GT Redline series, with less than 3,000 miles on the car, and still completely under warranty, is that I should call around while stranded in the middle of the prairie and see if other tire dealers have the right tire?” 

He back tracks very quickly, “I didn’t know your car was new.”  I recall leading with the new car under warranty earlier, but I say, “So, you, the parts expert are going to call around for me and find me a tire?”  He says yes.

Right after finishing that conversation the tow truck driver calls me and says, “Did you see me go by?  I ask him “what do you mean?”  He says, “I haven’t seen your car I thought maybe I drove past it.” 

“Dude, it’s the only car stuck in a ditch for 100 miles.”  He doesn’t respond.  I tell him to hold on.  I grab the latitude and longitude off the map app on the phone and text it to him.  “click on the link.”  I tell him.  He shows up five minutes later. After he changes the tire, I give him $10 and ask him to stay with me in case I can’t get my car out of the ditch.  Fortunately, the all-wheel drive heaved it right onto the highway.

I plug the KIA dealership in Sioux falls into the car navigation.  It is on Madison Boulevard.  I get there, find the parts manager and he has a slip of paper with “Tires, Tires, Tires, Mitch”  written on it.  Tires, tires, tires is the company, Mitch is the guy who is going to hook me up.  I say, “Great, where is this place?”  He says with a straight face, “Do you know where Madison Boulevard is?”  My brain actually skids to a halt.  I say very slowly, “Aren’t we on Madison Boulevard?”  He says as if he just realizes something, “Yea.  Yea. We are.” 


I final get a tire.  Its noon.  I have 500 miles left to drive.   The drive is essentially a straight line across South Dakota and Minnesota into Wisconsin.  You get close to the border with Iowa, but never actually get there.  About halfway through Minnesota, the farmland begins to turn a deeper green and have more forest areas.  The first picture is still in Minnesota on the edge of what is considered the Mississippi River Valley.  The photograph is looking west and you can see that steeper hillsides and thick forest vegetation that becomes more common. 

At this point, Highway 80 takes you through into Wisconsin and over the Upper Mississippi River.  The second photograph is taken just inside Wisconsin, looking west.  The area is river, wetalnds and a bunch of different rivers and creeks.  As I drove east, it got much warmer and much more humid. 

Shorter drive tomorrow, aiming for just past Toledo.